The Bipolar Otaku

Beloved, this saying is trustworthy:
whoever aspires to the office of bishop desires a noble task.
Therefore, a bishop must be irreproachable,
married only once, temperate, self-controlled,
decent, hospitable, able to teach,
not a drunkard, not aggressive, but gentle,
not contentious, not a lover of money.
He must manage his own household well,
keeping his children under control with perfect dignity;
for if a man does not know how to manage his own household,
how can he take care of the Church of God?
He should not be a recent convert,
so that he may not become conceited
and thus incur the Devil’s punishment.
He must also have a good reputation among outsiders,
so that he may not fall into disgrace, the Devil’s trap.

Similarly, deacons must be dignified, not deceitful,
not addicted to drink, not greedy for sordid gain,
holding fast to the mystery of the faith with a clear conscience.
Moreover, they should be tested first;
then, if there is nothing against them,
let them serve as deacons.
Women, similarly, should be dignified, not slanderers,
but temperate and faithful in everything.
Deacons may be married only once
and must manage their children and their households well.
Thus those who serve well as deacons gain good standing
and much confidence in their faith in Christ Jesus.
1 Timothy 3:1-13

Paul doesn't exactly tell Timothy what priests should be like, but I guess it would make sense that they lived up to the same standards as bishop. Let's see...
Irreproachable? I don't think I am.
Married only once? Not married at all.
Temperate? Pretty much.
Self-controlled? Occasionally.
Decent? Yes.
Hospitable? Besides a lack of basic conversational skills, yes.
Able to teach? Yes.
Not a drunkard? Not any more.
Not aggressive? Never.
Gentle? Yes.
Not contentious? Not explicitly.
Not a lover of money? Not really a lover of money, but a lover of things that money can buy.
Manages his own household well? Umm... no.
Keeps his children under control with perfect dignity? Don't know
Not a recent convert? Well, kind of recently re-converted...
Not conceited? No.
A good reputation among outsiders? Yes.

Eh... Well, I don't exactly fit the bill, do I?